


Dear Sam

by FriendlyNeighbourhoodSin



Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Brainwashing, Friendship, Passive-aggression, Swearing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-24
Updated: 2016-07-24
Packaged: 2018-07-26 13:17:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 557
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7575379
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FriendlyNeighbourhoodSin/pseuds/FriendlyNeighbourhoodSin
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Under Steve's advice, Bucky writes a heartfelt letter to the man he wronged multiple times.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Dear Sam

**Author's Note:**

> This is pretty short, bc I only had the ending planned out at first, and I pretty much just made it up on the spot. I'm still very happy with it though!

Sam,

I’m writing this letter because I’ve realized that I owe you an apology. I owe you more than one actually, and I’m a bit unsure on how to start. Things have never been easy for me, as far as I can remember, and they sure as hell aren’t now. That doesn’t excuse what I’ve done, especially to those who want nothing but to help me. I wasn’t very enthusiastic when Steve first suggested I write to you, but I thought afterwards that maybe it would help fix a fraction of what I’ve done. I remember our first meeting. It wasn’t really an official meeting, considering that I ripped your steering wheel from your moving car, nearly killing you, Steve, and Natasha all in one go. Things just went downhill from there. Sure I wasn’t in control of these things (and it’s not like I had a choice), but I still did them. There’s no changing that. 

You know, although my memory is still cracked and broken, when we had our first real interaction, you reminded me of somebody. Your attitude, your inability to mind your own business, the way that you won’t back down from a fight. You remind me of some skinny little guy in the heart of Brooklyn. It’s no wonder that you two get along so well, you share multiple qualities. Those of a good man. Steve was always that way, ever since the beginning. Like a hurricane that won’t let up, but then feels bad about the destruction it left in it’s path. Geez as tough as he is, he’s such a damn softie. Never could get it out of him.

Sorry, I got a bit off track. Anyway, there’s something I want to tell you. I’ve tried on multiple occasions to tell you face to face, but I could never do it. The timing never seemed right. Things kept getting in the way, either legitimate or something that I created in my own head as a defence mechanism. That happens often. The less someone knows about you, the less they can use against you. Hydra taught me that, in more ways than one. Did you know that they set up automatic deactivation codes within me? There were two different types. One for if I was captured by the enemy. They didn’t want anybody else to be able to use their greatest Asset. Their greatest weapon. The other for control purposes. If I ever broke through my conditioning, tried to fight back, they were prepared. One word was all it took to shut me down, and I’d wake up reprogrammed. 

That was extremely off topic, and I most likely made you uncomfortable. I’m sorry. I’m sorry for ruining your car (now makes sense that you wouldn’t move up your damn seat). I’m sorry about attacking you when I lost control. We watched the videotape, and I could have easily killed you. I’m sorry that I’ve caused so much trouble and nearly gotten you all killed. I’m sorry that I’ll never be the good man I was before and that nobody, including you, will ever be able to fully trust me again. But most of all, I’m sorry that Steve made me write you this letter. Because I truly, honestly, deeply do not give…

A singular fuck.

 

Not at all sincerely,

You bitch

**Author's Note:**

> This was inspired by a friend, who wrote a very angry letter to her stepdad. It makes me laugh every time.


End file.
